“The plans to lose weight and change personality kept me aloft for two days, only to collapse around my ears. I realize it was only a complicated form of denial.”
― Helen Fielding, Bridget Jones’s Diary
If you’ve read any of the Bridget Jones novels (or seen the films), you’ll know that Bridget often tries to ‘self-help’ her way out of trouble… with varying degrees of success! Those interactions with self-help aren’t always straightforward or successful: Bridget frequently struggles to fully apply the advice she reads, often leading to comedy outcomes.
Joking aside, it highlights the challenges and limitations of relying solely on self-help to deal with issues such as anxiety, work-related problems and imposter syndrome.
I’m not saying that it can’t be a valuable tool in personal growth and development – it’s great to have resources, books, and techniques that can guide us toward positive changes.
But here’s the thing: life is messy, complicated, and often unpredictable, and sometimes trying to find your own way out of anxiety and self-doubt just isn’t enough to dig us out of the trenches – we need an expert to help us get there quickly.
We’re all human beings with unique experiences, emotions, and challenges. While self-help can offer general advice and strategies, it doesn’t address our individual complexities. It’s like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole: we’re all shaped differently, and a one-size-fits-all approach won’t work for everyone.
It places the burden of solving our problems solely on ourselves, and while personal responsibility is important, it’s important to acknowledge that some problems are beyond our control or require external support – it’s okay to find help when we need it and not rely solely on our own resources!
Seeking support from others shouldn’t be seen as weakness, but if someone is going through a tough time and can’t seem to “self-help” their way out of it, they may start feeling guilty or inadequate, thinking they’re doing something wrong, which creates a cycle of negative emotions and makes things worse in the long run.
I know that self-help can sometimes perpetuate unrealistic expectations – it’s easy to get swept away by promises of overnight transformations or instant success – but real change takes more effort than reading your fifth, sixth or seventh book on the topic…! I’m not saying that fast results equal bad results, but it’s about how you get there that’s important. There’s little value in taking a long, tortured route when a professional can genuinely help you without dragging out the process.
If any of the above sounds like you, why not book in a call with me? My FREE 45-minute consultation with takes deep dive into how the problems you’re trying to solve alone are impacting your health, your work and your life, and will give you a roadmap to the steps you need to take to overcome any struggles you might have with anxiety, self-doubt and imposter syndrome.
